I often wonder what I would go back and say to my younger self...here is the best I could come up with at this stage in my life. I hope that some of you will also find some value in the conversation that I would have with myself if I could turn the clock back a few decades.
Without wasting any time, here is what is at the top of my mind in no particular order. Enjoy.
1. People will come & go. Hold onto the good ones...they are worth the investment.
2. Stop being what “they” want you to be.
3. Following the herd to “normal” tends to be the wrong decision & is filled with traps of false securities, debt & lost fulfilment.
4. Continue challenging just about everything. You’ll either flush out the problem, or you’ll be 10x more confident in what ever “it” is.
5. Do more hard things…this is where the growth and magic happens.
6. Nobody cares, work hard. Harsh, but 99.99% accurate.
7. Accept responsibility for EVERY aspect of your life. Your HEALTH, your HAPPINESS…your WEALTH.
8. You are the Captain of your life…don’t ever become a habitual victim.
9. Amor Fati – “A blazing fire makes flame and brightness out of everything that is thrown into it.” – Marcus Aurelius
10. Memento Mori – Remember that you will die…LIVE accordingly.
11. You can do ANYTHING you want…but you cannot do EVERYTHING you want. And that is OKAY. Read that one again.
12. Opinions of others mean almost nothing. Be especially careful of the opinions of the ones closest to you…they tend to have the most influence.
13. Love – Base your life around it. It’s high risk, and sometimes seems beyond painful, however, real love has the highest reward imaginable. Love yourself the most!
14. Never break your word. You have 1 reputation & it’s worth protecting with everything you have.
15. Invest in yourself early in these 3 areas: Skill building, Mental Health, Physical Health.
16. Most of your fear will be completely irrational. Learn to temper it.
17. Don’t be bought…your integrity, your will to win, your happiness…don’t sell these things. No one could ever offer a price high enough.
18. Motivation is fleeting & not enough. You need to appreciate the journey and not focus on the destination. The goal post will always move…trust me.
19. Stay curious & try new things. New foods, sports, music, jobs…etc. Especially when you are younger, but also as you age. Keep life fun.
20. Self-awareness – Always reflect & improve. You’ll never be done learning…if you think you are I have bad news for you…you’re dead.
21. Empathy – Have tons of it. You would be shocked at what others have/ are going through. Majority of people are just trying to figure it all out like you. Be kind.
22. Money & Success are much more different than I could ever convince you of. Money solves a ton of problems, but no matter how bad you want it to, it will not permanently change how you feel.
23. Start reading earlier. Take advantage of the thousands of years of the human experience written in the pages. The pain, the struggles, the triumphs, the successes, blueprints for success, fantasies, artistic masterpieces and so on are all in those pages. I’d be 10x further ahead if I had started reading seriously before 30yrs.
24. Consumer debt is the devil & comes from your ego.
25. Kill your EGO. It convinces you that you need it, but makes nothing in your life better. I promise…trust me.
26. Effectively communicating and problem solving will be your most valuable skills hands down. Listening & non-verbal are both major parts of the equation.
27. Think for yourself – Some, probably most, of your teachers will be wrong.
28. “Weird” is desired within a standard deviation of “Normal”
29. The “Joneses” are very broke, but your mind doesn’t want to believe it. The fact remains…they are BROKE.
30. It’s You vs. You. Are you better than you were yesterday? Any other scoreboard leads to misery.
31. Setting a STANDARD is better than setting a GOAL. Stop “hoping” & just implement/ execute on the STANDARD.
32. People close to you will die. Sometimes unexpectantly. It will hurt. You will learn a lot about life & yourself while enduring this pain. Appreciate your time w/ them & then live your life. Yourself & the rest of the living will appreciate it.
33. Lady Luck favors those of us that are prepared to receive her blessing! Prepare and welcome her.
34. Contrarian/ Rebellious aren’t swear words. Most likely means you are on the right path.
35. Time – Your most valuable asset. Guard it w/ your life, because it is your life…literally.
36. Born into family – Greatest asset or most painful influence in your life…especially early. Either way…forgive when necessary and live & let live.
37. Chosen family in adulthood – Matters more than you will ever know. Cherrish it, protect it & nurture it.
38. Alcohol & other drugs – Net negative. If you don’t have to learn the hard way… DON’T. You will lose friends & family to these nasty things.
39. Financial Freedom – Worthwhile pursuit. You’ll have to work harder than you think, even though you already work hard. You will need to become an owner as quickly as possible. Examples: Real estate, Equity, Commodities, Businesses, Precious Metals, Collectibles…etc.
40. Smile – People will be more interested in you and the things you have to say, and you’ll enjoy life more going through it with one.
41. Discipline = Freedom. Seems like the opposite as we view it traditionally as a “constraints”, but I assure it is liberating.
42. Keep your commitments/ promises to yourself. Nothing will kill your happiness more than breaking promises to yourself. Your perception of yourself and your worth will plummet.
43. You’ll never actually figure it out, and that is preferred. See #20
Sincerely,
Your 30+ yr old, still trying to figure it out self! :)
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